The purpose of these shots is purely to remind myself of what I was when I started this journey - what I am right now. By posting these onto such a public space, I'm hoping it will give me the motivation to not be this way again. To me, these shots are not just a physical representation of what i don't want to look like, they show me the how unhappy & unhealthy I am.
Behind the clothes, make-up and bulges there is a heart that is full of love for a Fiancé & baby, but none for myself. This is what I'm trying to change. One of my Mum's favourite songs was Whitney Houston's "Greatest Love of All". She would play it in the car, rewinding the cassette each time it ended to hear it again. It was a song my sister and I would sing at the top of our lungs in our bedroom in front of the mirror. At the time I didn't quite understand it's meaning.... but now I do. And this is what I'm trying to achieve from this process. At this point in time, I do not love myself. I have trouble even liking myself some days. But I used to love the person I was and I was confident about who I was. I know it will return, but it will take time, and hard work. And that is what I know I can do - hard work. I will make this happen. I will achieve my goal.
Thank you to everyone who has shown me their support. It has been very overwhelming. I am so appreciative. XXX
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